Parenting is one of the basic skills every married person should have. Especially, people who consider having their own family. However, at the end of the day, it boils down to it being a personal choice instead of a necessity. Marriage and parenthood are conscious choices an individual takes. But, before deciding to take care of a child, one needs to be perfectly sure regarding the decision. There is no room for indecisiveness or sloppiness in this scenario. The life of another individual, be it one’s own blood or adopted, gets involved deeply in such a scenario. It is no longer solely concerned regarding the parents anymore, but the kids as well. Toxic parenting is something which is observed very commonly in households throughout the entire world.
Especially in Asian households, it is observed that tough behaviour is equated with love and care. Scolding a child for merely breaking a glass by mistake or throwing toys here and there is somewhat okay, but reacting to an extreme extent in response is not something desirable. Children grow at their own pace while learning things as they grow up via experiences. It is essential for parents to show their children how to differentiate the right from the wrong. Although, they must be left to their own as well, to go through lived experiences.
Parenting is something that is natural to a certain extent. As one becomes a parent, the experiences slowly shape them. They may not be perfect at parenting and may have flaws. Parenting is often idealized to a great extent. Parents should sacrifice everything for their children in order to be ideal. Another prospect of this is control and dominance. Controlling a young child who has no maturity seems to be okay if kept mild, but as the individual grows up control should eventually be cut short.
Teenagers go through a phase of their own, as they struggle with complex emotions. A complex time while shifting from childhood to adulthood, parents need to become their children’s best friend. Always behaving like a parent or an authoritative figure doesn’t contribute to improving relationships with children. While growing up, children turn into teenagers and from that into adults. They observe their elders and develop their own thought processes. This development of thought process is slow and gradual. It takes a lot of time to evolve and reach a final stage.
Parents need to give their kids their own time to blossom at their own pace. Being amiable with someone younger than oneself, especially one’s own children is something quintessential. That way, the child can open up more and talk freely with parents. This can solve a lot of problems which generally stem from severe miscommunication. And this miscommunication stems from the lack of bonding between the guardian and the child. If the environment since childhood is something which is loud and crass, and toxic, it can eventually have adverse effects on an individual while growing up. Parents must ensure that the child gets to live in a healthy environment.
According to me, parenting class before having children is a must. It is natural for certain individuals to naturally be kind and compassionate towards the young ones, however certain people are unable to handle this perfectly. It might either be due to this being their first time as parents, or their own personal history of childhood trauma or pain. Childhood trauma is often cyclical in nature. This cycle would continue if no measure is taken while there is still time. Lessons on parenting can prevent this cycle from continuing in the future.
The Momma Clan 
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